I Am A Simp? Wat? Huh? For Marrying A Filipina?
Today I feel I must address a serious allegation against me. Aspersions have been cast, assumptions are being made and I must clear the air right now.
The other day I received a YT comment that I was a simp. Have you ever heard of a simp? I didn’t fancy myself a simp but apparently someone thinks I am, and if one does, maybe others do as well. I’d like to explore this further. Maybe you’re a simp too?
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I am shaken by this misconception. What’s more, some of you who are trying to find a wife overseas might be seen as a simp as well and give up looking, which would be terrible. Love Beyond The Sea is about doing the right thing-getting married and managing that union for a lifetime. Some people will misunderstand the methods I talk about but I am putting them to use myself.
I quickly consulted the enigmatic MrE, as you know, he is a mysterious, very secretive and private individual, with a broad base of knowledge and skills, and I asked him if he thought I was a simp and this is what he told me.
"It is another day and another Mr. E. statement. Today, Bob has asked me to comment on what is a simp and if like some commenters have asserted, is Bob one himself.
First off, what does the dictionary say about what is a simp? A simp is "A man that puts himself in a subservient/submissive position under women in hopes of winning them over, without the female bringing anything to the table; a one-sided relationship."
In other word's in Mr E's definition (he’s speaking in the third person), it is a man who has no backbone and is so thirsty he lacks any self-respect for himself, just to get a whiff of a female. He is a doormat! In Mr. E's eyes it is someone both men and women should never respect, just on the basis he is selling out his dignity just to get a little action. In other words; it is a classic definition of a blue pill beta male. If there was a category below that, I would put simps there.
So, to the question, is Bob a simp? Before I answer this question, I would like to give you, the audience an education on being humble and not running your mouth and making yourself look like an idiot. So, before you post that snarky comment; gather around because class is now in session. (Is MrE a teacher? No one really knows, but my question seems to have struck a nerve in him. Maybe he had been up all night grading papers?)
We have once again drive-by commenters who like to be armchair dating guru's and like to make observations that make them sound smart, buying into the fact that observations can be made by watching a few YouTube videos.
You see class this is something called cherry-picking! Cherry-picking for those who skipped English class is defined as: "the act of pointing to individual cases or data that seem to confirm a particular position while ignoring a significant portion"
It also goes by the name of confirmation bias.
So, for those commenters, what you are doing is engaging in an argument of selective observation. You see you cannot make accurate judgements by watching a few YouTube videos, just as you cannot make an accurate observation of someone's life by looking at someone's Instagram page. In both cases you are missing a great majority of information as that information is curated.
To say Bob is a simp, is quite SIMPly trolling. I have known the real Bob and Aiza behind the scenes for quite a bit now and I can assure you it is far from a one-sided relationship. Both parties (Bob and Aiza) give just as much as they take and Bob is not subservient to Aiza, as he will lay down the law if need be. For that reason, this is in contradiction to the definition of a simp. Therefore, to answer the question, is Bob a simp? The answer is an unequivocal NO!
But for those who like to make snarky comments, what does it make them look like, class? Being petty and making passive-aggressive statements is the very definition of beta male behavior. An alpha just doesn't care, as he has better things to do and doesn't engage in such antics! If need be like I am, he will get the full picture through investigation before he runs his mouth and makes a judgement. Class is now dismissed!"
Class is dismissed but don’t run out the door yet, I have some comments of my own. I tell you what, MrE is not one to mince his words. I think he got his point across. On Love Beyond The Sea, I want to help men find a good wife from the Philippines, to be good to her, so she can respond to him in the way every man wants. I married a Filipina in May of 2015 after many years of wondering if it was meant to be for me to get married. Looking back, marrying a Filipina was simple.
I appreciate my Amazing Aiza very much, I appreciate her more each year. The things I reveal about my beliefs about how to treat a wife to some, might come off as being simpish. I am not good to my wife in order to win her over or get something from her. I married her in only 54 days, so she simply didn’t know me for very long. I treat her the way I do because we are married.
MrE later added this-… he (a simp) does everything he can to please a woman, yet she has zero respect for him and she doesn't reciprocate in kind. The simp believes showering her with gifts and giving her undeserved attention is the key to her heart and she will love him for it. Healthy relationships don't work like that, that is what we call being a sucker and she will exploit that at every opportunity. End Quote
Our’s certainly isn’t one-sided. I told her when we got married that I wanted to help make her dreams come true. I didn’t have any idea what they even were at that point, but whatever they were, I simply wanted to try my best to make her happy, to give her the best life I could, to make her feel loved and cared for. My, what a terrible thing to do! Maybe I should repent in sackcloth and ashes. I don’t subscribe to a philosophy of “halvsies” where I do my half and she does hers, I’ll scratch your back if you scratch mine. I am simply doing what I promised her I would do.
I do admit to wanting to serve my wife. Yes, you heard me say it, but hold on, that does not mean in some kind of subservient, lower class, obligatory way. The Bible tells me to regard her as better than myself, and in general, we are to regard everyone that way, but that doesn’t make us all simps. Being a servant-leader of my wife is simply obeying biblical instruction. I didn’t win my wife over with flashy gifts and insincere praise and empty promises, I did it with my philosophy of marriage. If it didn’t appeal to her, she would have had other suitors.
If serving my wife is stupid advice, then Jesus, God himself, was a simp, since he loved his bride the church enough to endure the hell she justly deserved. He stepped up and met a great need even when she was disobedient. Simply incredible! He didn’t really need a bride, he was God! Yet he recognized need and wanted to meet it. He is the ultimate husband. This is a very profound truth that requires a lot of meditation. The person every knee will bow to one day is considered a simp by many. Don’t ever consider him a MGTOW! The Lord is all man and you will be too if you learn his ways.
Here’s how it is supposed to work. The husband sacrifices and serves his wife, the wife recognizes his authority over her, and is his helper. That is the essence of marriage. I can assure you putting my wife first pays off and is in my best interest.
I have published a video by request on a wife’s role of being submissive to their husbands. If I can talk about love dolls and sexpats, I can talk about this too. See what you’re missing if you aren’t subscribing?
To further make my point-
From the urban dictionary-
Basically, someone who gives redundant and over the top attention to women that are of far less value than the attention or praise given. Usually the recipient of this praise is knowing of this and is taking full advantage knowing this fact.....Thus the term "sucka" is the main attribute and usually the results in the pending downfall of this kind of man. My wife is worth my effort to please and be good to. She isn’t taking advantage of me. We both give and receive. Anyone that knows my wife realizes what she brings to the table and how much I appreciate her.
A man that puts himself in a subservient/submissive position under women in hopes of winning them over, without the female bringing anything to the table. Again, I won my wife over very quickly as we got married in 54 days. She understands that I am her head, the one who answers for our relationship before God. I think some people were shocked when I returned from the Philippines, that I actually did go there to marry.
If I had been desperate, I would have settled for someone long before I got married. I didn’t know what she would bring to the table exactly as we hadn’t known each other for very long. I just started our marriage being good to her and she has been good to me.
•A man that puts too much value on a female for no reason. Maybe there are men who do that, but I didn’t. I wanted to be married because I believed that was the right thing to do, the best way to live. I understood no woman was perfect so I didn’t look for one who was. I understood all couples have challenges. In reality, I believe a woman does have value but not for “no reason”. The most value she has in life is to be a good mother and a helper to her husband, anything else falls behind that. Yes, I said that.
•A man that prides himself with "Chivalry" in hopes of getting sexual gratification form women. I don’t have to hope for sex.•A square with no game other than “Rolling out the Red-Carpet” for every female. All women are not the same, I looked for one with character and integrity.
A man who puts women on a pedestal when she clearly doesn't deserve it. He thinks all women are victims and they barely do any wrong. He usually does this to gain favor with women aka try to have sex with her. I am as much affected by beauty as the next guy and I like giving compliments. However, I can tell when a woman is trouble. I was looking for someone serious about marriage and there was not going to be any intimacy until we were.
As far as decision making-We’ve had disagreements about priorities, as has anyone else. There have been times I knew I would get the silent treatment for doing what I thought was best. I believe I am to be considerate of her and realize as my helper, I must consider what she tells me, she knows me better than anyone else. Even that isn’t being a simp, it is being wise.
So, you men who love your wives and strive to make them happy, you’re not a simp either, just keep doing what you’re doing.
I’m not going to change how I treat my Love Beyond The Sea!