Podcast Episode 160: Compromising is Needed in a Fil-am Marriage
Compromise is a necessity for any relationship to last, can you imagine how much more this is likely to be needed in a relationship with a woman from the Philippines who may be thousands of miles away? Give me a few minutes of your time and I will show you some areas where being able to compromise will help you to be a good husband. Please subscribe to Casting Beyond The Sea for help for foreign men looking for Filipinas and who want a quality, lasting marriage. Videos are on Love Beyond The Sea. I think any man looking to marry a Filipina needs to be prepared to make compromises and concessions to this woman because of the many differences the couple will have to deal with, but they can be overcome.
I married my wife on the first time to see her, on day 54, so believe me, I know how important compromising is. What are some things where compromise will be needed? Here are some in no particular order.
Food-If you don’t have a rice cooker, you will be getting one. I regularly ate brown rice before my Filipina wife arrived in America, but basically haven’t eaten it since. My wife just doesn’t like brown rice. I can tell her it’s healthier and maybe she even agrees, but it is not what she has been used to all her life in the Philippines.
There is no use to push the issue with rice. My wife would feel terrible if she were to go two days without rice. Depending on the Filipina, she might want to cook other foods you aren’t accustomed to and might not want to be. My wife makes foods she is familiar with that I don’t eat, but she always has food that I do like available and cooks for us regularly. Be ready to find an Asian Market even if you have to drive for a while. This is important for her to eat some familiar foods, which you would likely do if you were to move to the Philippines.
Oh, don’t throw food out, don’t waste it. This is a serious crime.
Friends-If you have friends or acquaintances who are women, your Filipina probably won’t be comfortable with them having the same place in your life as before. She can be fiercely jealous, which I see as a good thing. This observation is from what I have gleaned from others, not so much myself, because I didn’t have women who I had as good friends before. If you are used to doing anything at all with someone like this, be prepared to change that dynamic for the good of your Filipina.
We used to work at the same place so naturally since I’d been there many years, my wife understands I have worked with many women and some of them are work friends. The good thing about this is Aiza has met them and likes them too. My little woman is a class act!
Music-I grew up in a home with a musical father and we probably heard our share of music while we were in the womb (I had a twin sister) so I can’t imagine a life with music. To some men, music isn’t all that important. They might like it but don’t go crazy over it. Be prepared if married to a Filipina that she might be listening to a lot of it and much from the Philippines in which you wouldn’t know the words. I think she needs to be able to do anything she previously liked and it will help her acclimate to her new country.
I will have more in the podcast here on Casting Beyond The Sea.
Intro & Outro
Night In Venice by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/5763-night-in-venice
License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Smooth Lovin by Kevin MacLeod
Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4379-smooth-lovin
License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/