Relationship Advice

Helping Your Filipina Wife Find The Right Friends

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Leaving all you’ve ever known in your life and moving thousands of miles across the planet to live with someone you are still relatively unfamiliar with, is a daunting move. Your wife will need friends. But she needs friends in high places, not low places. She needs friends who are mature and can help her be spiritually grounded.

They don’t have to be Filipinas. As soon as I got back from marrying her in the Philippines, I called my pastor and asked him if he knew any Filipinas, and probably, if he knew anyone that knew any Filipinas. I thought it would be great if she knew at least one other Filipina. He knew a man involved in Christian ministry married to a Filipina maybe ten years older than my wife. I got his email address and messaged him that I just married a Filipina and was looking for another to be a good influence on her. He said he would do that. They took the initiative to invite us over to their house and watch some quality DVDs with their family and have dinner. We have had them over to our place a couple times for dinner.

This was an answer to prayer! I contacted a man I know that married a Filipina around the year 2000. It took many months for him to reply since he didn’t usually use FB, but he eventually did and we have had them over a couple of times and Aiza has gone shopping with her at Costco. She is twenty or so years older than my wife. Shortly after my wife arrived, a lady at church who is a couple of years older than my wife, with the help of another woman, planned and organized a “Welcome Shower” for my wife. I was not invited! She received about 45 gifts and the church only has an attendance of about 75! They were very impressed with my wife. This church had prayed for me to find a wife at my request.

My instructions were to not let up until it happened. It ended up taking maybe a year. Since my wife doesn’t drink alcohol, she isn’t going to make the wrong kind of friends. I saw alcohol decimate my parent’s marriage and others and want nothing to do with it. I am concerned about her being influenced by the wrong people, especially at work. I don’t think that has been the case to this point. If some there was trying to influence her the wrong way I would make sure to put a stop to it. I try to reinforce to her what the right kind of friends are. Value marriage and commitment, aren’t partiers, Christians preferably but don’t have to be.

If she has Christian friends she is more likely to get the right advice, not the advice of the world which would be anti-marriage. Church is a good place to make good friends. There are plenty of horror stories of Filipinas getting wrongly influenced by “western women”. All you can do is pray for God to lead her to good friends and do what you can to identify them. By this I mean regularly, consistently.

I think since I made this video my wife has made friends with two more Filipinas who have been hired at her workplace. We recently did karaoke with them.

You can’t do it alone, pray for friends for your Love Beyond The Sea!

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