Doing this comes with great rewards! My wife treats me like a king. I actually give up nothing by putting her needs above my own, and I gain a lot. I believe that is the way a husband loves his wife. Christ “gave himself up for it” (her) referring to the church he suffered for. He came to serve, and so am I to serve my wife. Probably the most poignant way this has happened is that I tried to give my wife a baby even though
I have told her, that I wasn’t expecting or desiring to be a father, but to be true to my statements to her about what our marriage was going to be like, I have submitted to her desire to have a baby. Frankly, this makes sense as I want someone to be there for her, to take care of her when she is older.
We have talked about the fact that I am her spiritual head, but that doesn’t mean I boss her around, just the opposite, it means I am responsible for the health of the marriage and have the final say, however, I will try as much as humanly possible, to defer to her. This has not been too difficult, believe it or not, because God has given me a peace with giving up my own life, as it were, for the good of Aiza’s, which is pleasing to God and has been a blessing for me. It is much easier for a wife to submit to her husband when she knows she is first in his life (behind God), and he treasures her. Establishing this early on can yield dividends to your marriage for the rest of our life. Our relationship has gotten better since she arrived in America because I have been able to put actions behind the words I had for her during the visa process and being apart. A beautiful Filipina is an incredible blessing. I think about her all day long, which isn’t surprising, because Christ’s bride, the church, is on His mind constantly, and He wants her best always.
Think about what He endured for us, for His bride, how He cared less for His own wellbeing, and did everything He could to meet the needs of his bride. This is how men are to love their wives. Christ set a high bar for us. I believe we are acting as “one” when it comes to trying to put the needs of the other first. We go in with each other on our doctor appointments, we sometimes eat on the same plate, I include her in all decisions. We touch often. We compliment each other. I’ve gone from having no female companionship for 30 years to having a partner, a companion in life. I hardly think of doing something without her. Without a doubt we are best friends. Something to emphasize on your end in the initial stages of being together is your spiritual headship. She will need to know you will take her to church and encourage the use of her spiritual gifts. Decide on a way to learn from the Bible together such as a short devotional or talk about the Bible verse text of the day for example.
Here is an exchange I my wife and I had one night on Facebook. This was music to my ears at the three month mark!
Paraphrase- “Having a good husband who is very dedicated in everything He does being a good provider, God-centered/Fearing, loving and caring. He puts me above all(besides God). I am so blessed to have you in my life and be my Husband. .I know ,we have so many differences, but one thing that we have in common and that's God…I pray that God will bless and guide us always. I know also that we have a long journey to walk together, learn new things and experiences, but God will lead us in the right direction. Nothing could I ask for. You are my best-friend and everything. Thank you for the prayers. I love You Hon.” (wife)
My response- “My love, you have made me feel whole and complete. I am completely satisfied holding you in my arms, in great peace. You are my best friend and I honestly have you on my mind seemingly always and dream about you too. God has shown me such wonderful love by bringing us together. I will never stop loving you! Yours forever, ---hubby” Making my marriage all about my wife-spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, gives back 100 fold.
I hope this helps you prepare to be with your Love Beyond The Sea.