Ephesians 4:1-3(ESV) 4 I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Am I teaching her the Bible?
Am I often praying for her?
Does she know that I am as concerned about her spiritual health as I am her physical health?
Mental, emotional, etc...?
Do we talk about our spiritual commonalities?
Do I ask her what she learned at church or what she is reading?
Ephesians 5:25-33(ESV) 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.[a] 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Does she think my love is reliable, consistent?
How else can I show my love to her?
Are there activities I can reduce or eliminate in order to have more time with her?
Do we have spiritual conversations about what God has been teaching us? Do I feel joy when sacrificing for her in some way?
Do I pray for her spiritual growth and development?
Am I as concerned about her own well-being as I am my own?
Are there things I can do so that I know that I love my wife as my own body?
Ex: I encourage my wife’s spiritual growth by insisting we go to church regularly. This also includes communion when it is offered. We plan on getting baptized soon since we were both baptized originally as infants.
Ex: I pray for her regularly throughout the day. There are certain places I pass that are my reminder to pray for her right then.
Ex: I need to talk to her about the Bible more, and I have at times but especially would like to do better at simply reading to her the daily Bible verses a friend of mine sends a group of people.
Ex: I prayed to find other Filipinas in my city so my wife can get to know someone to help her adjust to being away from home. I realized this would be difficult for her. I tried to anticipate things she would deal with when she arrived.
Ex: I paid for certain tests for her months before she went to Manila for tests so that if something wasn’t right, we could deal with it ahead of time.
Ex: I have made sure anything she needed medically was taken care of when she got here and from here on out. Since she is frugal she often balks at this but I am responsible for taking care of her and I want her healthy now and long after I am gone. We go to her female doctor early each year for an annual physical. The first one showed she was very low in vitamin D so we have supplemented with that and retested.
Ex: Even if it was cosmetic in my opinion, I have allowed her to go to a specialist about it. I say “allowed” since we pool our money and make big decisions together. I have never been afraid of doctors or hospitals surgeries (have had many) so this makes it easy for me to want my wife to be healthy.
Ex: I’ve talked about patience in the first part of this series. As far as gentleness, this would have to do with using kind words, not bad language, overlooking things she did that you maybe weren’t happy with and being forgiving.
Ex: Never harm her physically. Never harm her emotionally. If/when you say something hurtful, apologize and ask her forgiveness. Watch your tone of voice.
Ex: Remind yourself of what she left behind to be with you if she immigrated to your country. This will help you bear with her.
Ex: Do things together! Since we are both homebodies, that often means here at our house. We seem to be ok with that but I think it is important to go on a big vacation now and then and some smaller vacations together. This promotes unity and builds memories.
Ex: For the sake of peace, learn how to bite your lip from time to time. Try to gently bring up issues you need to talk about.
Ex: ‘Loves his wife as himself”- Ephesians 5:32. This is self-explanatory but still thought provoking.
The reason I am setting these verses out for you is so you can make application in your own relationship with a Filipina.
Loving this way will be reciprocated by your Love Beyond The Sea!