Having options is a good thing but sometimes it makes it difficult to be sure you made a good choice. A church elder told me that there is nothing better than a good woman, and there is nothing worse than a bad one. On Christian Filipina where I met my wife, you will probably get an overwhelming amount of contacts whether it be winks, chat requests or personal messages. It can become addictive to look forward to the newest profile to see.
This presents a situation that is made more difficult if you are of the belief that you are searching for “the one”, that there is just one soul mate available for you. I’ll explain why I do not subscribe to this, and believe me, the thought crossed my mind at one time in my life, but that can be paralyzing. If there is only one woman out there that God intends for you to marry, then what if she dies or marries someone else?
What if He doesn’t want you to marry a Filipina, someone so far away? Having umpteen choices on a dating site is one thing but believing that there is only this one woman for you that God desires you to marry can be daunting enough to give up before you even start. Here is what helped me. What are the requirements for marriage, other than what is in the law? What are the restrictions? After pondering it and recalling what I had learned about marriage while I was single all I could come up was this-marry a Christian. That’s it.
Marry someone with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ as their Savior and Lord. That’s the only requirement for a Christian. Tied into this is the fact that God wants all to be saved. There is no best age or age difference mentioned, distance isn’t mentioned, culture isn’t cited, how much time to search isn’t a major issue either although there is one crucial caveat; no fornication. If that means getting married at 18 with a short engagement so be it. That tends to speed things up, or at least it should. Knowing God warns against fornication should drive a man to marry like there is no tomorrow. Sex is the big reward to drive someone to marry.
Yeah, I know about that waning in later years, but when seeking a Filipina, you can marry a much younger woman. People told me when I was younger “sex isn’t all that it is cracked up to be”. I didn’t believe it then and I certainly don’t believe it now after being married about three years. This is something I am thankful for or else I might never have gotten married. Marriage is GOD’S idea. There are biblical references of God being married to Israel and of Christ having a bride; the church. Being married is being like God in that sense. The Bible is replete with wisdom on how to love each other and even what love is (1 Corinthians 13:4-8). Since God invented marriage and built into us the need for it, you can begin to see why there is only one mandate, because He doesn’t want us to be bogged down or paralyzed thinking there is only one woman out there and if we miss her, we are not in His will. Another big reason why we are not as limited as we might think is that God owns the whole earth and there are a lot of women there, like a Filipina, who is open to marrying a foreigner.
Before I met my wife, I didn’t see merit in pursuing anyone more than fifty miles away simply because I wanted time to spend with them, in person. Because of inventions like Skype we are able to communicate with potential mates that would have been difficult or impossible in the past. Is that what I signed up for? Of course I signed up for a wife I just didn’t’ think it would happen as fast as it did. Once we decided to focus on each other to the exclusion of everyone else, we moved at warp speed and on day 18 I proposed and she accepted. I identified a woman who was saved and was willing to marry me, despite being 27 years younger. I didn’t see the need to prolong the search when I found what I was looking for.
I believe God would have been happy had I pursued many others but I am obligated to pick one and the sooner I did the sooner we would be together in America. I doubt any algorithm in the world would match up this combination-male 53 with average looks, no college degree, from 1st world country- female 26 and beautiful, has college degree, from 3rd world country, different prime languages, virtually 10,000 miles apart, male desires a commitment before meeting in person.
We may be an unlikely couple but not to God. Yet, we have been together here in America since January 11, 2016 and I feel like I won the lottery. We have our arguments just like anyone else but God gave me a wife who is so good to me and for me.
There are many options to be your Love Beyond The Sea.