Lately, I have pondering the question “Does Love Exist?” Like most existential questions like “what is the meaning of life?” this one often gets different answers depending on who you ask. In modern times it is in vogue by both sexes to bash the concept. The consensus from manosphere is that love doesn’t exist and it is silly to ask such a question. Contrary to what some of my peers think in the space, what they are equating for love is actually lust; there is a very big difference.
So your probably asking; Mr. E if lust isn’t love; then what is love?
That is a good question that often gets disregarded by most people. The fact is most people never experience love because they aren’t looking for it. You probably know by now that 50% of the adult population in America is divorced. What many often overlook in that statistic is many people in America get married for the wrong reasons. Just because you are married doesn’t mean your in love, you can be lustful and get married.
Lust is born out of our carnal desires of pleasure and our inherent greediness of getting what we want. The problem with lust is it does not have an end goal; it is meaningless. Once you have obtained the object of your desire; you are left feeling empty. In short, lust is a physical reaction to someone who you find attractive, but have no desire to care beyond the superficial. Superficiality is a major problem within our society, we no longer actually get to know one another beyond the superficial. That is the main reason people proclaim from the rooftops that love doesn’t exist.
During my younger years, I always lusted after the cheerleaders especially ones with blonde hair. I’m quite sure other men can relate to this. However, as I have gotten older; I realized that while at the time I may have been “in love” with them I was actually lusting after them and that I actually dodged a bullet, as there personality and values wouldn’t have matched up with mine. These relationships would have ended in disaster!
I think by now you probably understand that the modern interpretation of love is actually incorrect and that people today aren’t actually searching for love. You see real love does not happen overnight, the whole stereotype of falling in love at first sight is a feel good marketing gimmick created by Disney.
Love is nearly identical to lust in the gut feeling you get, but the major difference is you actually enjoy having that person around when you are in love and the feeling is mutual. You can only figure this out by extracting your emotions as hard as it is and critically assess if you enjoy having this person around. Love is born out of infatuation, but the necessity of loving their physical appearance is a distant second; you respect and admire them for who they are or what I like to call “jiving” with them. This is what love is!
The ultimate determination to find out if you are in love with a woman is to ask one very simple and important question:
I be happy if this woman would be the mother of my children?
That is it! No special rituals, no gimmicks, just a very simple question you ask yourself when your not in the heat of the moment. This question I have found always grounds me and helps me make better decisions in finding a high quality partner for a relationship/marriage. If the thought of knocking up that woman disgusts you, that is the rationale part of your mind saying no. When you are in love this question is answered unequivocally yes without hesitation.
Love is a declaration of mutuality between two people that they are willing to build a life together. This declaration between two people pays off as when you are on your death bed; you are surrounded by people who wouldn’t exist if you didn’t commit to this declaration, they owe there very existence to this bond between two people. For that reason they love you unconditionally and are sad to see you go, as that love is now lost.
So the next time someone says love doesn’t exist remember that what they think is love is actually lust and if you actively search for it you will find the love of your life.
So don’t let anyone tell you can’t find your Love Beyond the Sea!