Relationship Advice

Women-How Your Husband Needs to be Loved

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I am going to give you a link in the description box of 100 ways a Filipina wife can show her husband that she loves him. In this video I will talk about some of the ones that are important to me, and how you might suggest this need to your wife. My intent is for the foreign husband to be able to look through this, and highlight the things that he thinks his wife needs to know about him. I am only going to cover the ones that I need to express to my wife. Recently I had the first 37 ways. This is higher Fil-West education, as I desire to make marriage great again.

This is more challenging for some men than others, but I want to make it easy for you. It may have been written for women to use, but I am going to turn it around so that the man makes the first move here. I think it is important that he be able to openly talk to his Filipina wife about what he needs her to do to show him love.

Please subscribe to Love Beyond The Sea for practical, honest help with being a loving husband to a Filipina. I am thrilled to be married to my Amazing Aiza, through the ups and downs and frequently recommend a Filipina as the type of woman to look for. There will likely be things I will learn from this list that I hadn’t even thought about talking to my wife about. The main message here is to speak up.

37. Help your husband to be the Spiritual head at home (without “lording” it over him). (I have said things like “Honey, you know I am the head of this union and I am responsible before God to take the best care of you, so please, talk to me about_____ and allow me to _____.) (An example would be if she wants to brush aside a health issue that I want her to get checked right away to prevent the possibility of this becoming more serious in the future. She might say it is too expensive, but I tell her that I really need to make that decision about spending a lot of money for it, and I want to do that.)

38. Reserve some energy for him so you’re not so tired when he wants you sexually.
Don’t expect him to do projects beyond his natural capabilities.
40. Pray for him to enjoy God’s best in life.

42. Brag about him to other people in front of him and when he’s not there. (I admit, sometimes I want her to tell me what she says about me to others,)
“Look into your husband’s eyes when he talks to you. This makes him feel that you’re interested.” (J. Clain) (Usually happens when she is on her phone, and sometimes the same can be said of me. It is possible to say “look at me” without sounding like a demand.)

48. Be his “help-mate” in whatever ways you sense he needs it.

51. When your husband is in a bad mood give him time and space to recover.

52. Help him to finish his goals, hobbies, or education.

57. Thank him for things he’s done around the house. (It means a lot to men). (I need her to appreciate what I do and I need to hear her say it. Doing the laundry is one thing but I think handling the financial affairs including working with our financial advisor, is something I want her to appreciate, as I mentioned earlier. I say to her that I hope she appreciates how much time I put into this.)

59. Make sure he agrees with everything important that you’re planning to do.

62. Initiate sex periodically. And respond more often. (All you have to say is something like “Sweetheart, I love making love to you and if we don’t do if for a certain period of time, I get cranky but I also miss the closeness that it brings us. We need to somehow make this more regular.” Maybe each of you needs to sacrifice something that takes enough time that it interferes with your sex life?)

64. Get to the point in your discussions. Spare him details unless he wants them.

70. Be kind and courteous with him. (Don’t be kinder to strangers than to him.)

71. When things go wrong, instead of assessing blame, focus on how to do better. (I do talk about that, that both once we have expressed our dissatisfaction, we need to think of solutions and get over it quickly, without holding grudges, always forgiving.)

75. Hold his hand and snuggle up close to him at times both at home and in public. (I have talked a lot with my wife about this, about PDA and to her credit she is doing this more because I tell her how important it is to me, and since I am important to her, she wants to oblige.)

77. Tell him you love him more often.

79. Sit with him while he’s watching TV—even if the program doesn’t interest you.

80. Don’t expect him to read your mind (despite your thinking he should— extend grace).

82. Check with him before you throw away his papers and stuff, when possible.

83. Put effort in to keep yourself in good shape so he’s especially proud to be with you.

87. Visit his childhood home with him.

89. Pray for him.
Look your best—dress to honor and make him proud to be seen with you when you’re out together.

92. Support him when someone tries to put him down. Be his best cheer leader.

95. Cheer his successes whether it’s related to business or other areas of everyday living.

96. Graciously teach him how to demonstrate his love for you.

97. Give him coupons to redeem—maybe for a back scratch or a shoulder rub.

98. Buy him a gift certificate to his favorite lunch spot and put it in his wallet.

99. Hide notes for him around the house where only he will find them.

100. Thank him for just being himself.

The author is unknown, for the list of “100 Ways.”

I will put these in the description box if they all fit and it will be linked as well. Please look through this list for yourself and I hope I have shown some ways to raise the issue in a way that expresses the affection you need. That doesn’t mean that your wife never does any of these, rather that for the good of the relationship and a little stroking of your ego, it makes your efforts worthwhile to be the wife that he wants you to be.

That’s what I tell my love beyond the sea.

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