Marriage Advice

Is My Fil-Am Marriage an Illusion?

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What makes for a legitimate marriage?

Why do some people doubt the veracity of someone's relationship? Mt.19:6-God has joined two together*/Any requirements? (age, age gap, culture, education, arranged or choice, geography). *marriage is between a man and a woman Arranged marriages are marriages. I am glad to have a choice. Some people have a long list of requirements in a spouse but that isn’t helpful. It is more important to know your role as a husband and be committed to it.

The Bible describes roles-Husband sacrificial provider, wife-submissive helper. I know a couple with a 52 year-age gap. This man discussed his needs at that stage of his life to the woman he married, and how it would benefit her. He needed a helper after his wife passed away, especially at his age. He explained how this would benefit his wife and children. She agreed. They got married. I see nothing wrong with this.

When two people are married, they are married and have to make it work. Choosing wisely is important. For me, I needed a Christian, who wants to be my helper, and to meet sexual needs. I talked to my wife about what I needed in a wife. She could tell me what she needed in a husband. These needs are basically universal.

They need to be supportive of each other. They need to be committed to each other. People’s main objection to marrying a Filipina is that she wants more than a husband, she wants a green card, citizenship, someone to provide for her. You know what? Those are good things.

I wanted a woman who was poor. If she thought marrying me would give her a better life and a brighter future then so be it. I love to take care of her materially but also emotionally. She knows I am crazy about her. My wife does meet my simple needs. Companionship, intimacy, touch.

We plan on doing this until one of us dies. Then she likely moves back to the Philippines unless we think I can live there after retirement. Is my marriage legit? Yes it is because I am committed to fulfilling my role as protector and provider (more than money), and she has been a helper in the ways I need it. I am satisfied and I think she is too. The whole world is a possibility for finding a wife/She might not be in your country.

You might have to find your Love Beyond The Sea.

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